Vacation Report

After Christmas, we took some time away for some R&R. We typically don’t take too much time away because things tend to pile up. However this time, we planned to relax and enjoy each other (NO OTHER AGENDA). Funny thing that happens when you as a family just decide to hang out with each other and in some respects, getting reacquainted; you can like what you see.
We played some table games together, rode bikes and took a few hikes in the rain, but most transformational was the conversations. It has been said that you don’t need quantity of time as long as you spend quality time.
Personally I think that person is missing something; if you don’t spend the quantity of time, you will never get to the quality time. So you end up lying to yourself and everyone else that short amounts of time are ok.
As a family, especially if you have young children, you need to be present and spend time listening to them, not just laying down the law. Learn to enjoy their company and what things they like to do and talk about. It is only then that your time spend becomes quality relationship time.

Have a Blessed New Year!
Tobin

DADS, be WITH your Children Today…

My Book this month:
The 7 Secrets of Effective Fathers by Ken Canfield.
“Becoming the Father your Children Need”

Ken Canfield has written many different books, and the best one in my opinion is “The Seven Secrets of an Effective Father.” In this post, I am putting a plug in for his book as well as creating dialog with you about being more effective with your family understanding all of us are limited on time.

I have a friend who’s son is 3000 miles away, it tears him up that because of the choices he has made and the current life situation he is in, that he must be a loving father from far away. So it got me to thinking, we as dads may be home every night and see our children every day, but are we 3000 miles away emotionally? Connectedly? We need to evaluate our being there. Just because we are physically present, we may not be “there”. Our mind might be on work, wife, home projects left incomplete, a friend, the sports games or statistics; what ever it is that is not allowing us to live in the moment with our children, is what is causing a divide.

So what do you do with your time when you are with the children? Do you play games? Do you keep busy? What about creating conversation? Are you listening to your children and not just talking to them? Are you teaching Scripture and praying with them, not just praying for them?

Part of being effective with our children is prioritizing our “coaching” based on scripture. Discipling our children is a day in and day out process, not a class or Bible Study. Inputting Scripture in a practical way throughout our day.

Two great examples: an “acquaintance” of mine told me about one time they were out in the park watching the fire works and as the explosions reverberated across the hills, he overheard a dad, with his young children, point to them and say, you know kids, this reminds me of what the Scriptures say, “Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works, and Glorify the Father in heaven.” The family talked for a little while about light and what it means, then moved on. He saw a teachable moment and used it to point his children to God and His Word.

The other example is in the Audio Series by Vision Forum; “Jonathan Park”. Every story, every episode is packed with fact about Creation, life and its daily struggles, as well as families exhorting the Scriptures in the little moments of each day. You too can find teachable moments of your day to relate to the Bible and as you do so your mind will be expanded as well. Meditate on God’s Word and share that with your family!

In case you don’t have Canfield’s book, here are the 7 Secrets:
1.    Commitment
2.    Knowing Your Child
3.    Consistency
4.    Protecting and Providing
5.    Loving Their Mother
6.    Active Listening
7.    Spiritual Equipping

So, from the list, and my post, I hope you have been sufficiently sparked to curiosity.  I will be posting later on each of the Secrets.

The National Center for Fathering; www.fathers.com sells the book for $12.99 English or 50% off in Spanish. or you can go to www.amazon.com and find it for as little as $0.01 Used + shipping or electronic version for $6.95.

Today, be WITH your children, listen to their hearts, not just their voice, be interested in them and What God made them to be! BE IN TODAY, TODAY!
byTobin

Day 2–Beautiful Life Management 28 Day Challenge

 

Today was a day of interruptions.  I don’t handle those very well–interruptions that is.  I always joke with my husband that my life looks perfect on paper and then life happens.

It all started last night when I stayed up late helping with a project.  To my frustration my alarm rang this morning and it read 6 am instead of 5 am.  I must have been hitting snooze for the last hour.  I snuck in a hurried Bible reading and rushed to get ready for the day before the kids were up.  I was not able to get a hold of my thoughts until nap time.  That is when I saw the error of my wrong thinking and attitude.  Instead of realizing that I had started my day interrupted and I simply need to make adjustments accordingly I was just frustrated that everything was not working out as I had planned.  Sigh…  In the end I was able to ask for forgiveness of God and my family for my frustrated attitude.  As I get ready for bed I see that I was able to get most things done.  I got my workout in later in the day (and the kids joined in which was fun), wiped the bathroom as I washed my face and brushed my teeth for bed and my kitchen sink is empty and wiped clean.  Although I did not get to the big pile of “to file” in my office, I did clear all paper clutter throughout the house–kitchen, front door, computer desk and school done box.

What I learned today and what I am thankful for today is interruptions.  It was a good, hard lesson I learned today.  I would love for my life to be neat and orderly with everyone falling into line with everything I have scheduled and planned.  But God gave me a minister husband with an unpredictable schedule, and 6 children–I don’t need to say more;)  The thing about interruptions is not the interruption itself but how I handle the interruption–rejoice in my interruptions.  So I will continue to pray and ask for grace to handle each interruption with patience and love, always looking for God’s will.  This was my strength today: Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’  Isaiah 41:9-11

Click here Dodge Family Routine for Tuesday to see what I hoped my day would look like.  We did make a valiant effort to get as close to the schedule as possible.

Beautiful Life Management 28 Day Challenge

A few weeks ago I was introduced to a wonderful company GraceWorks.  They sell beautiful planners specifically geared towards the wife, mother and teacher.  Two amazing resources Tricia offers for free is the Planning to be a Blessing booklet and the Beautiful Life Management 28 Day Challenge.

I have taken Tricia on for the 28 day challenge.  Today is day one.  It was a very good day.  In part from planning ahead but also from the encouragement that Tricia offers.  And to keep you accountable she has you email her everyday, she offers encouragement and tallies your points.  There are prizes at the end.  Prizes even motivate adult

The thing that kept us all going today was my Dodge Family Routine for Monday.  I just recently added a wide format printer to my office and just love that I can print an 11 x 17 page.  All day the kids kept referring to the poster for what was next and the little ones kept asking anyone that could read to tell them what was next.  It was a great motivator and a visual reminder of what was next.  The schedule also flowed well for us because I even figured in free time and down time.

All in all it was a very good day and I am excited to see what will happen in my home in the next 28 days.

Meal planning

One of the most time consuming things that a wife and mother has to do is meal planning and preparation.  And as you will always hear me say here, having a plan is best.  Check out our menu plan for this week here.